I love the ritual of New Year's. Getting dolled up, lighting sparklers and dancing like no one is watching will forever be my preferred way to ring it in. I am also a sentimental person, so I love remembering special moments and honoring periods of hardship. It feels good to recognize the passage of time and feel the momentum of life moving onward. 

What I don't like about our New Year traditions is the impulse behind reflection that ends in resolutions. Why do we spend so much energy at the beginning of a new year trying to change something about ourselves? We focus so much on what we don't like about ourselves that we lose the joys and pleasures of what a fresh start can be. 

I think it's safe to say that 2020 is going down in the history books as one of the most challenging years of our lives. We had a global pandemic, an uprising, a contentious election, and then on top of all that, life continued as it does with all the everyday hardships that accompany being human. I am looking back on this year and celebrating how strong, brave and resilient I am, and I am looking at 2021 with pleading eyes begging for more ease and softness. 

So this is how I'm getting that vibe started: 

Instead of doing a cleanse or joining some 30-day boot camp on January 1st, I'm going to spend the first month of 2021 reflecting on what brings me joy and allowing myself to immerse myself in those pleasures. I'm going to take my time peeling an orange and really savor each section bursting with flavor in my mouth. I'm going to smell the oils that orange peel leaves on my fingers and let the joy of it take me away for a moment. I'm going to allow myself to be seduced by the notion of eating another orange and wonder if my pleasure will be greater or less than what I experienced while eating the first. I'm going to give myself permission to find out - or not - depending on my whim...

I'll be posting my daily pleasures on Instagram as part of my "30 Days of Pleasures." I want you to join me in bucking the tradition of "fixing" something in yourself and seek joy in your everyday life instead. If this sounds like something you'd be interested in doing with me, here's how to participate: 

1. Express a pleasure you experience every day for 30 days, starting January 1st. These can be small joys (i.e. first sip of coffee in the morning) or big acts of pleasure (i.e. spending an entire day cooking), but every day be present with the experience of it. Be as specific as possible - that last sip of coffee really isn't as good as the first! Try to recognize pleasures that engage all your senses: taste, touch, smell, sound and sight. 
   
   
2. Decide on your medium. You can make a photo journal or a written record of your pleasures. I will be sharing my 30 Days of Pleasures on Instagram and using the hashtag #30daysofpleasures to keep my posts organized. I invite you to do the same and encourage you to tag me (@jessehaasnutrition) so I can follow along and relish in your joys with you. 
   
   
3. Commit to not filtering yourself. If you find joy in french fries - awesome! If you find pleasure in a vibrator - sweet! If you find joy in lounging on the couch stinking to high heaven and rolling your tongue around a mouth of unbrushed teeth - fantastic. Allow yourself the space to truly experience the pleasure of it with no judgment, shame or guilt. 
   
   
4. Give yourself time to reflect on the experience. Make some time with these questions at some point through the experience. You might opt to do this weekly or just at the end of the month. You may prefer to talk through your responses with someone going through this practice with you or settle in with your journal to write them out: 
   1. What do I notice in my body when I allow myself permission to experience pleasure? 
   2. What thoughts arise when I indulge myself in my pleasures? Where do those thoughts come from? Do they have a story to tell about me/my experiences? 
   3. What would happen if I continued experiencing joy and pleasure in my daily life at the end of this 30-day experience? What am I afraid will happen if I do/don't?
      
      
5. Optional: Gather your people (Feel free to make this a solo practice if that feels best to you). Invite your family, friends, colleagues, faith groups, neighbors and/or social networks to join you. Consider making your joys and pleasures social and visible - imagine how much the world would change if we all shared our joys out loud and proud! This is also a way to build some positive accountability in sticking with it, inspire others and also share your experience with people you love and trust. The more the merrier!
   
   Here's some language you can use on Instagram or Facebook to make the invitation to your crew: “I’m joining @jessehaasnutrition in #30daysofpleasures. Grab a friend and join us in bucking New Years resolutions in favor of savoring tastes, smells, sounds, sights and other sensations that bring you pleasure."

If this practice resonates with you and you'll be joining me in it, please let me know! Shoot me an email or tag me on Instagram (@jessehaasnutrition). It is one of my pleasures to witness joy, so you'd be helping me in my own savoring practice!

​This is going to be FUN! 

Every client I met with last week said (a variation) of the same thing: 

"With everything that's going on in the world right now, taking care of myself feels low priority."

I get it. Things are really wild right now. We're all holding A LOT: a pandemic, an uprising. We're faced with our mortality while examining our thoughts, behaviors and actions that are either a solution to the problem or part of the problem. We're talking about hard stuff every day while trapped in our homes. 

This is uncomfortable stuff. 

It's also the stuff that changes the course of humanity. So keep doing the good work...AND let's get you back to caring for yourself while you're doing it. 

I keep coming across the flight attendants' reminder from the beginning of every flight: put on your oxygen mask before trying to help someone else with theirs.

This idiom reminds us that before we can do any good for anyone else, we have to first do good for ourselves.  

If you read nothing else on this page, read this: You are no good to any movement or cause or community or human, animal, or environment if you are not good to yourself. 

How you care for yourself right now might differ from how you cared for yourself before the pandemic hit the US. It might differ from how you cared for yourself before George Floyd's murder. The self-care you need now might be totally and completely new to you. 

Have you taken the invitation to explore that and make a self-care plan that's just for you in this specific moment in your life? 

Shelly Tygielski (@mindfulskatergirl) has authored a number of articles on this topic for Mindful.org related specifically to self-care during the pandemic. She gives 3 good reasons why taking time to do some internal inventory and create a plan for caring for yourself is not just important but critical. I think these are especially important for those of us who are activated by recent events in Minneapolis and the movement they sparked in our nation and world. 

Here are Tygielski's reasons to make a personalized Self-Care Plan:

"Customizing a Self-Care Plan is a preventative measure." Ultimately, you can prevent all kinds of suffering by taking some time to reflect and strategize. You are going to be much better ally and activist when you are NOT in crisis mode. This movement needs you thinking, feeling and communicating clearly and effectively. That is not possible when you're exhausted, burned out and fueled by caffeine and sugar. 

"Having a plan takes the guesswork out of what to do and where to turn in moments of crisis." Don't wait until you're fried and inconsolable to decide how to care for yourself. Plan ahead, so you can respond instead of react to your circumstances and what you're experiencing in that moment.

"A Self-Care Plan helps you stay the course." You don't need to put your health goals aside to participate in protests and social activism. You don't need to put yourself last because this moment feels bigger than you. This moment is bigger than you...which means that we need you to be your absolute best right now! And we need whatever action you take to be sustainable - this is a marathon, not a sprint. 


Now that you know you need a Self-Care Plan, follow this link to get Tygielski's directions on creating one for yourself or download this worksheet I made adapting her recommendations to a visual form. 

Time for true confessions: this is hard for me too. My stress response is to freeze. I have felt frozen in anxiety and fear for months now.  I try to care for myself by eating regularly, exercising and meditating, but I'll go days - or even weeks - without any real success in that department. I'm more successful with my favorite dissociation techniques.

I followed Tygielski's prompts to come up with my own self-care plan. Here are some activities I'm working on in my Self-Care Plan right now: 

Eating at regular intervals. Instead of stress eating, I tend to neglect eating when I'm stressed. This leaves me feeling my worries even more acutely. Not helpful! I'm setting a calendar reminder to go off midday every weekday to remind me to take a lunch break and again mid-afternoon to offer a snack break.

Start the day with movement. Moving my body is my 2nd favorite medicine following closely behind my #1: eating delicious food. I tend to come up with all kinds of excuses about why I can't exercise as the day goes on, so I'm working this into a morning routine. Which brings me to...

Meditate daily. I am needing more grounding and focus right now. I am still sheltering in place, which means my life schedule is lacking the kind of structure I had before of going to the office and the gym, etc.  I am not good at maintaining a routine, so without structure to my day I feel untethered. Meditation helps me connect to myself in a very helpful way. I'm working on 20 minutes every morning after my morning movement. 



As you're working on your own Self-Care Plan, notice any resistance you have to giving to yourself. Here are some wise words from Rachel Elizabeth Cargle (@rachel.cargle) that helped me put this in perspective for myself this week: 

"...Meditate AND call your senator. 
Go to yoga AND go vote. 
Breathe deeply AND donate to causes that matter. 
Go on a retreat AND go support small businesses. 
Enjoy your essential oils AND check people on their bullshit in the community."

​Recently, I wrote an article about emotional eating. At the time, it felt important to recognize the mental, emotional and social challenges we were faced with as we collectively navigated life in a pandemic...challenges and stresses that often drive us to the kitchen looking for comfort or stimulation.

More than a month later, this conversation may be even more relevant as an uprising has sprung around us in Minneapolis since that last article. More challenges. More stress and uncertainty.

Here's a brief recap of what we know about emotional eating:

It works.

Our brains respond to foods we find pleasurable with a dose of dopamine (our "feel good" neurotransmitter). This brings us satisfaction, calm, comfort...really, dopamine is the balm to any negative feeling! So really - truly - emotional eating works. 

People are motivated to come see me by health challenges or goals they have. Emotional hardship definitely makes the list of things they want to work on. I work with folks who experience depression and anxiety, emotional states that are often triggered by moments of acute stress or struggle. And many of my clients effectively use emotional eating to soothe these negative feelings. 

While we see a chemical benefit to eating comforting food in response to a negative experience or emotion, ultimately we know that ice cream is not the solution to loneliness. Corn chips cannot entertain us out of our boredom. And no amount of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches will bring us back to our childhood where a caring adult was telling us everything was going to be ok.

Emotional eating also poses the threat of numbing us to our emotions or aiding us in dissociating from what we're experiencing. Eating instead of dealing with our feelings head on isn't going to solve the problem of that loneliness. Or the boredom. Or the insecurity and disappointment of being an adult and finding out that everything is not ok. 

Instead of eating when we feel these things, I propose experiencing them. For you in the back, yes I am suggesting that you experience the yuck. Keep in mind that you may need some support with this. Before making a choice to actively heal, get yourself a counselor or other mental wellness support to aid you through the hardship of feeling your feelings. 

When you're ready to proceed, give this a try: 

1. Make a list of all the ways you can soothe yourself that don't include food. How do you stimulate yourself when you're bored? What options do you have to socialize when you're lonely? How can you soothe yourself when you're disappointed? Here's my list:
   Bored = go for a walk, color, read fiction, exercise
   Lonely = video chat with a friend, make a date with my wife, start a Macro Polo convo
   Disappointed = write all about it in my journal
   
   
2. Make a meal plan. This doesn't have to be a "eat this" at "this time" kind of meal plan. It could be as simple as "I'm going to eat breakfast, lunch, an afternoon snack, and dinner." Plan out when you are eating...and by doing so you will also plan when you are not eating. 
   
   
3. When you find yourself browsing the kitchen for a nibble outside of that plan, PAUSE. Check in with yourself by asking, "Do I have physical needs for food or am do I want to feed something else in me?" If you are physically hungry, eat! If you are looking for food for a loneliness/boredom/disappointment bandaid, proceed to #4. 
   
   
4. Reference the list you made in step #1. Look for something that jumps out at you and says, "Oo, yes please!" And then, do that. Turn around, walk out of your kitchen and do that thing that actually addresses your emotional need and will help you heal. 
   
   
5. Whether you're successful with #4 or not, let it go. This is a mindfulness practice. My favorite part about mindfulness is the practice of "non-judgment." Mindfulness is not about being perfect or nailing it on the first try. It's called a "practice" for good reason! 

When we practice mindfulness we become better at being ourselves. We can be more honest and reflective, which means we are better partners, better parents and just all around have more ease and peace. We bring that ease and peace into the world we live in. 

This is what self-care looks like. It's not always sexy. Sometimes, it's really hard work. But it's hard work that pays off. It's hard work that brings healing. And who knows what beautiful things you'll create with your hands and your heart if you let yourself grieve and be angry and transform hurt into health. 

Eating has proven time and again to be an effective way to bring ourselves comfort in times of stress and grief. I don't know about you but stress and grief are two emotions ranking high on my emotional radar these days! Navigating the foreign landscape of living during a pandemic has turned the volume up on these human emotions, as well as worry, frustration, and boredom. 

Now, more than ever, we need effective coping skills. 

If emotional eating has become a regular way for you to cope, I invite you first to give yourself a break. Things are really hard right now. The future is uncertain. Caring for yourself, however you can, is a very important thing to do. 

Here's another reminder:  eating is not the ONLY way to give yourself comfort . 

Let's put a pin in that thought and dive into the science of emotional eating. I think understanding how your brain and body work helps to get some perspective and empower a different approach to self-care. 


The Science of Emotional Eating:
Food - and even the anticipation of eating it - triggers a release of dopamine from our brains. Dopamine is a powerful chemical signal (neurotransmitter) your brain produces that makes you feel good. A number of things trigger its release: falling in love, accomplishing a goal, eating sugar, gambling, smoking cigarettes, and taking cocaine or other drugs, among others. In bad times, dopamine is suppressed, making the desire for it even stronger and the effects of it more impactful.

For the record, I would consider living in a pandemic as being a "bad time," so this bit particularly applies to us right now. 

The effect of this "feel good" release in our brains is not equal from one experience to the next. If you ate the same amount of sugar one day after another, the amount of dopamine released would be less and less. This is how addictive behaviors develop: in search for more dopamine you need more sugar (or cigarettes, cocaine, etc.) every day to get the same hit of dopamine.

If you find yourself craving food and seeking out food for comfort, stimulation, or emotional release of another kind, take a deep breath. You're not doing anything wrong. You're actually satisfying a biochemical need. And it's ok to keep doing that. 

If you feel ready and able to change up that coping mechanism for another that will be equally effective, here are some strategies to prepare yourself to make that change:

1. Eat at regular intervals to balance your blood sugar and help thwart cravings. Start by eating breakfast within an hour of waking, then plan a meal or snack every 3-4 hours until dinnertime. Stop eating after dinner. 
   
   
2. Incorporate sources of protein and fat into your meals and snacks to further support this goal. Protein foods include eggs, meat, fish, and poultry; cheese and Greek yogurt, lentils, tofu and tempeh. Some good options for fats include avocados and guacamole, olives, nuts and seeds, nut and seed butters, coconut, and oils (coconut, olive, avocado, flax).
   
   
3. Serve yourself a meal or snack on a plate or bowl, instead of eating out of a bag/box/container. This will help you choose more diligently how much you are going to eat. It will also force you to consider whether you are hungry for more before automatically eating more.
   
   
4. Be present with your food; savor the experience of eating it. To do this, eat without distraction - no TV, Instagram or work. Mindful eating increases the connection between your stomach and your brain so you are better able to perceive feelings of hunger and satiety (fullness). Additionally, you will enjoy the food you eat with intention more than food you eat mindlessly, increasing your satisfaction with each bite. 
   
   
5. Make a list of other ways you can soothe yourself. Reference this list when you're inclined to eat outside of your planned meals and snacks. Some ideas include taking a walk, calling a friend, coloring, doing yoga, taking deep breaths or meditating, taking a bath, journaling, laughing, and having a private dance party.

If and when you find yourself emotional eating, despite your best efforts to do otherwise, here's my closing thought: 

Let it go. 

We are living in a very trying time. Be kind to yourself. Recognize that you are expressing self-love the best way you know how. Find soft edges where you can stretch and learn and grow, where you can try some of the strategies above. Know that you will succeed and you will fail. That's learning! Learn with kindness, compassion, and forgiveness for the perfectly imperfect human that you are. 



For more on dopamine and emotional eating:
​What is Dopamine?
Dopamine is ______? 
Emotional Eating: Experts Reveal The Triggers And How To Control Them